If You Are a Writer... Write!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Falling Words

And the words slip from me,
joy and passion and happiness.

Do you want to feel with me?
Do you need to share with me?

And the touches of reality
are lost in the spaces between
the falling words...

The only things I feel anymore
are the heartbeats too erratic
and a breath that comes labored.

Ache upon ache, only to be split apart,
only to be rent.

I know that time will be
the tale worth telling
but by what measurement will it be?

Share with me
Feel with me
Free me from this

And I slip away

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

On Mom...

I haven't felt much like writing. And mom being a writer too she is probably disappointed in me for that. Times of struggle are times to write, to express the emotions that are swirling, to sort out the chaos of your mind with pencil and paper. But this cancer scared the holy crap out of me as it snuck back into our lives. Mom is healthy, she eats better than me, she gets more exercise than me, she is young, she is at peace living on her mountain volunteering her time for half a dozen committees that do community service... she should not be sick.

But she is.

But the first round of chemo has been pumped into her body. She had to stay in the hospital for it for seven days as her platelets were to low to surgically put the pump in her chest that would have allowed her to stay at home and have the chemo administered that way. Nearly every day I call and talk to her. She is back home on her mountain again resting, eating well, healing, letting the chemotherapy do what it is supposed to do. In a couple weeks she will have another round, eventually 5-6 rounds of chemo. He blood numbers say it is doing what it is supposed to, but no real results will come for quite a while. The waiting is difficult. But life and healing can take time.

Thank you to all who wished me well here and via email. Your support really does mean so very much to me. And for my mom I will try and write more the next few weeks about living more than this as Mom is more about living than this pesky cancer any day.

Love and peace to you all as you all give me back the same.